This is one of the most hilarious stories I’ve seen yet.
“Long ago the bombs fell and the world ended. You are one of the few who is still alive. You are trying to survive by scavenging among the ruins of what is left behind. You walk for two hours and take a break. You’ve left the town you were in and are now in a more rural area. You look around and see a farmhouse with a barn nearby, it looks like your destination.
> go inside
You enter the house and find that it’s been completely destroyed. The front door has been blown off its hinges and there’s nothing but rubble outside. Inside however, everything seems to be intact save for a few broken windows.
> look around the house
You search through the wreckage of the kitchen and bathroom and find some foodstuffs. They seem to have been untouched by the fire and you notice several bottles of water lying on top of a table. You also find a small bag of flour and a bag of oats.
> make food
You make bread from the grain and eat it. It tastes very bland though so you decide not to eat anything else until you can get more supplies.> look for more supplies
You look around the room for any sort of useful item and come up empty handed. You then think about your last meal and realize that you haven’t eaten since before the bombs hit. You begin to wonder if you should go back home or stay here in this ruin.
> go back home
You head back home with the intention of staying there as long as possible. You figure you’ll eventually run out of food and water and you won’t be able to hunt anymore either. You’ll just have to settle down and wait it out.
> look for zombies
You continue searching the house for any signs of zombies. You don’t see any of them and when you start looking through the broken windows again, you see no living people either. You also hear voices coming from upstairs which sounds like it might be someone’s.
> look upstairs
You cautiously peek out the window and see that the voice was indeed coming from upstairs. There’s another person standing there, dressed in civilian clothing. He looks at you with disgust and says “I’m sorry, but I can’t let you come in here”.”What?” you ask.
> hit him
You quickly grab his wrist and knock him over. He falls backwards and you kick him in the face causing him to fall further. When he hits the ground, you take advantage of his confusion and stab him repeatedly in the chest.
> walk in the room
You walk into the room and see that the man you killed is now lying on the floor. His clothes are covered in blood and he doesn’t even appear to be breathing. He looks like he’s dead. “Who are you?” you demand.
> go to the library
You head to the library where you read a book called ‘The Last Book’. It describes how books were once used to keep track of information, but they’ve become obsolete due to advances in technology. In fact, most of the information in the world is stored electronically nowadays.
> read it
You skim through the book and find that it does indeed describe the future. However, it also contains some predictions about the past. One of those is that books will soon become obsolete because computers will replace them.
> look for food
You search the shelves for any sort of edible substance and come up empty handed. You then think about your last meal and realize that you haven’t eaten since before the bombs hit. You also remember that you didn’t bring any food with you when you left the house.
> go to the store
You head to the local supermarket and buy yourself some bread. You also buy some milk and juice. You fill your glass with both liquids and drink them all down. The next day you wake up and realize that you’re hungry again. You wander outside and see a small shop.
> go into the shop
You enter the shop and notice that it’s very quiet. You also notice that the door is slightly ajar. You step inside and see a young girl sitting behind a counter staring intently at her computer screen. She turns around and sees you and smiles brightly.
> ask her what her name is
You speak quietly so she doesn’t overhear you. “My name is..”. you begin to say, but she interrupts you. “No, my name is… oh thank god!” she exclaims and runs out of the shop.
You sigh and sit down at the counter.
> look at the computer
You look at the screen and immediately recognize the words “Doomed City” written across it. You pause and try to work out if this means the city has been destroyed or not. Then you suddenly stop and wonder if you should go back home.
> get on a plane and go to egypt
You get on a plane and fly to Egypt. As soon as you land, you run straight towards the nearest building and start firing off bullets at anything that moves. You don’t know why, but you feel compelled to do something.
> find love
You spend the rest of the week looking for someone to marry. You meet several women and eventually settle on one named Tanya. You never thought you’d ever feel this way, but you decide to stay in contact with her. You tell her everything about yourself and she seems to really like you.
> ask her to marry you
You ask Tanya to marry you and she says yes. You smile and kiss her before leaving the airport. You return to your life as normal.A year passes…
It’s been five years since the bombs hit and the world has gone completely to ****.
> ask tanya to move in with you
You have no idea how long you’ll be able to live without her, but you need to make sure you can take care of her while you can. So you ask her to move in with you. She accepts instantly.
> travel the world with tanya
The first few months after the bombs hit are difficult. Your family isn’t exactly well off and you don’t have much money either. But over time things improve and you manage to save enough money to buy a place of your own.
> have a child
Your son is born in November of 1998. He’s healthy and happy, but he does have a tendency to cry a lot. You figure he’s just going through the baby stage, but he cries a lot more than usual. You’ve tried everything to help him, but nothing works.
> change his diaper
You change his diapers every two hours until he cries less. It takes awhile, but eventually he stops crying altogether.You think you might be done with diapers now.
> feed him
You feed him every three days and then some. You don’t want him to become dependent on you. You also don’t want him to grow up thinking that food is something you’re going to waste.
You also don’t want him to grow up thinking that you’re weak.
> get a job
You get a job working as an assistant manager at a local diner. The pay is low, but it’s better than being homeless. You keep telling yourself that you won’t have enough money to support a family someday, but you’re wrong. Five years pass…
> celebrate your sons birthday
You celebrate your sons birthday by spending the day drinking heavily and having *** with a woman who was your waitress when you were married. When you wake up the next morning, you find that your wife has left you again.
> move to europe
You move to Europe where you continue to work as a waiter and live a quiet life of leisure. Five years pass…
> go to taco bell
You go to Taco Bell and spend your free time eating tacos and watching TV. You always wonder if you should leave or not. You could probably do so much better than you are right now.
Ten years pass…
> go to wendys
You go to Wendys and spend your free time drinking and playing video games. You never really feel like doing anything else except for ***. Ten years pass…
> go talk to your son
You talk to your son about your problems and he tells you that he doesn’t understand why you aren’t leaving. You tell him that you’re staying because you love him and he’s right. You’ve been holding back all this time.
> give your son money
You give your son $100 which makes him very happy. He says he’ll take care of himself and that he hopes you stay. You look at him and realize that maybe you shouldn’t have stayed. Maybe you should have left sooner.Twenty years pass…
> retire to florida
You retire to Florida where you spend your remaining retirement years enjoying the pleasures of the flesh. Twenty years pass…”So I guess you’re my daughter?” you hear a voice say from behind you.
> say ‘ i dont know’
You turn around and see a man dressed in black standing there. “I’m sorry, but we just found out about our bank account being overdrawn”. He says looking at the screen on the computer.
“What happened?” you ask.
> walk away
You walk away and tell him everything. He looks disappointed though.”Wellâ€¦we can’t be sure we didn’t make a mistake”. He says.”No, we did. We’re getting evicted”. You reply.
> leave him and walk away
You walk away and tell him everything. He looks disappointed.”We need to check”. He says.
You follow him into his office and enter the door. Inside, you find a large monitor showing a map of the city.
> look at the city
You look at the city and then look at the map. The two of you sit down and begin to look at each other.”Look at this”. You say.
> go outside and enjoy the fresh air
You go outside and enjoy the fresh air. It’s nice to be outside again. You think about how you’re going to deal with the situation when it comes up.
> go on a cruise
You decide to go on a cruise. You figure you’d get away from the city for awhile. You don’t want to live here anymore anyway. You figure you’ll start over somewhere else. The next day you board the ship and set sail towards some unknown destination.
> jump off the boat
You jump off the boat and onto the deck. You look around and see nothing out of place. You wonder if you made a wrong decision.”Hey! What the **** are those things?” someone shouts.
> jump into the water
You jump into the water and swim away from the others. They were probably scared ****less. You swim as fast as you can until you reach land. You look around and see nothing out of place either. You do notice something odd though. A small island appears out of nowhere.
> go onto the island
You head to the island and explore it. You find it completely deserted save for a single tree. You walk up to it and examine it closely. It seems to be made of wood, but its leaves seem to be green rather than normal leafy green.
> find love
You take a deep breath and stare intently at the tree. Your eyes meet with the tree’s. You immediately feel a strong sense of euphoria. You smile and touch the tree. Its bark feels warm to the touch. You sniff the tree and find that its scent is very pleasant.
> jump around with the tree
You continue to stare intently at the tree while jumping around with it. Eventually you stop and gaze upon your actions. You sigh and look back at the tree. You realize that you have been spending too much time staring at the tree.
> swim off the island
You swim off the island and back onto land. You look around and see nothing out of place. You continue to search for anything out of place. You find nothing out of place however. You continue to swim for hours. Finally you come across a cave.
> go into the cave
You enter the cave and begin to breathe in the pure oxygen of space. You gasp and giggle uncontrollably. You forget all about the others. You forget about yourself entirely.
Everything fades to black.
You continue to swim through the endless void of space for hours. When you finally surface, you find yourself in a vast empty plain. There is no life or death anywhere. The only thing you can make out is a large hole in the ground where the sky used to be.
> jump into the hold
You jump into the hold of the spaceship and begin to float there. You begin to laugh uncontrollably. This is not real. This is just a bad dream. You begin laughing so hard that you fall unconscious.
When you wake up, you find yourself floating in a bright white room.
> go back to the insane asylum
You return to the asylum and tell everyone what happened. Everyone is shocked. Dr. Gossey says she has never seen anyone like you before. She asks you how you came to be here and why you did not kill yourself when you woke up.
> stay there
You stay in the asylum for several months. You do not speak to anyone else except Dr. Gossey. You slowly get better and eventually you even manage to talk again. You explain everything to her.
> talk to your roommate
You go back to talking to your roommate. You tell her everything that happened. She tells you that you should be glad that you were able to talk to someone who actually knows you. You then ask if she would mind if you stayed over tonight. She agrees and you leave the room.
> sneak into the room
You sneak into the room and take a seat on the bed. You start to feel very strange. Your eyes begin to burn and you feel sick. You feel like you are going to die any second. You sit there for hours listening to music and thinking about the future. Eventually you lose consciousness.
> go to sleep
You go to sleep and soon after you do, you feel better. You think about the future and realize that you will probably have to live it as well. You decide that you will try to escape from this place by finding another way out. You immediately head to the bathroom and wash your face.
> talk to your roommate more
You go back to talking with your roommate. You tell her everything that happened. She tells you that you should be glad that you were able to talk to someone who actually knew you. You then ask if she would mind if you stayed over tonight. She agrees and you leave the room.
> escape the insane asylum
You decide that you need to escape now because you don’t want to spend the rest of your life locked in an asylum. You quickly gather all your belongings and prepare to leave. You enter the elevator and press the button down. It begins its slow descent but suddenly stops completely.
> press the button again
You press the button down once more and the elevator begins its rapid ascent. You look at each other and smile. This was definitely worth it.
You run through the front door and onto the street. You make it outside where you see a large explosion. The city is in chaos and the streets are filled with smoke. You run towards the sound of gunfire and explosions.
> find love
The next day you meet your girlfriend Julie. You both get married and live happily ever after.
CONGRATS YOU WIN”